Two Things You Should Save For Marriage

For the most part, we can all agree that breakups suck.  Even if you needed out of the relationship, no one wants to have the awkward who-gets-to-keep-the-homebar convo, who-gets-those-sox-tickets-for-the-game-we-were-supposed-to-go-to-next-week convo, or in my case the is-it-still-cool-if-I-hangout-with-your-sister convo (she’s AWESOME).  After witnessing some pretty shitty breakups, I’ve decided there are two things I vow to save for marriage:

First of all, Netflix sucks to share even while you’re in a relationship.  I had my Netflix account perfectly catered to my taste (Dumb and Dumber, Step Brothers  type movies… the occasional RomCom) and next thing I know my ‘You Might Also Like’ section was completely full of military war history documentaries.  Let me tell you… the last thing I want to watch after a long day at work curled up on my sofa in yoga pants and a bottle of Cab is “Vietnam: American Holocaust.”  Not only that, after the breakup the ‘Recently Watched’ list pops up and you realize the cheap ass didn’t even get their own account.  Password change? Check.I don’t make a lot of online purchases, call me old fashioned but I like to hold the product in my hands.  That said, I haven’t used Amazon in over a year.  I know this because the last thing I bought (apparently) was a college graduation gift for my ex’s younger sister.  He didn’t want to be involved in the process so he said “You do the shopping and just put it on my card.”  Everyone is happy – I get to make sure she gets something nice, I don’t have to pay (well… monetary funds at least), and he gets credit for the nice gift while I sign the card “From Ex and Sarah.”  Just last week I got the urge to read The Hobbit and went ahead and ordered it off Amazon.  One click, then another, and the next thing I know I’m reading the confirmation email with HIS NAME ON IT.  Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.  The Hobbit??? Really??  Why wasn’t I buying some crazy sassy lingerie?! Or a raunchy sex tape.  Or heck… a new TV!?  My $7.45 book, The Hobbit, is going to show up on his credit card statement…

Mark my words: I’m saving Netflix and Amazon for marriage.

3 thoughts on “Two Things You Should Save For Marriage

  1. Hahaha this is brilliant! Well, if this was all the same guy I guess you’re kinda even after his Netflix use. Sadly, I watch a lot of things on the sky box which I can in no way control when my boyfriend is left to his own devices in the house 😦

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